I'm a dog person

Are you a cat person? Do you have 9 cats?

I recently purchased a house that had nine cats. I'm not sure how a person can have that many cats. The house, you would say, stunk to high heaven (or is that stank?). The cats had urinated everywhere inside the house.

When our realtor took us through the house, we had to hold our noses. As we walked through the house, we had to watch our steps, because there were literally cats everywhere. Unbelievable!

Despite the cat smell, we liked the house. More importantly, we loved the neighborhood. So, we went ahead and purchased it. We knew that we would have to put in a lot of work, but the house had great potential. Little did we know how much work would go into getting rid of the cat smell. Over the next several blog posts, I'll let you know what we had to do to rid our house of that awful smell. Hopefully you never have to go through it, but if you do, I've got the secret for you!

P.S. After this experience, I will never own a cat. No offense to you cat people out there.

Don't Call Me Scabby's

I think that I have adequately built up the suspense for the next BOTM post. For you newbies, that stands for Burger of the Month. Please refer to previous posts for a full explanation of all its wonderfulness.

Our first BOTM excursion didn't go over as well as I had anticipated. I knew that we had to have a strong showing for our second outing otherwise we might have BOTM members yielding themselves to the example of our resident "vegetarian" (Veggie Victoria) by giving up red meat altogether. An extreme reaction, I know. Because it was such a vital decision, I decided to allow one of the most reliable BOTM members to choose this weeks restaurant. That is right. You know him has NASCAR Ned.

Ned is brave. He chose a restaurant at which he had never eaten. A bold move. But, Ned is a bold kind of guy. He chose Scaddy's. He saw a billboard advertising their fare. I guess those billboard advertisements DO work.

We, the BOTM members, broke into 2 groups to travel to Scaddy's. All the rest of my coworkers went in one group, and my boss and I went in the other. I thought this might be the opportune time to discuss my raise (what with all the extra time that I was putting into the BOTM club). But, somehow the topic never came up.

Here are the results from the "scientific" surveys that each BOTM member filled out after eating at Scaddy's (results are on a scale of 1 to 10...1 being "I think I just threw up in my mouth" and 10 being "I think I just died and went to heaven"):

Meat: 8
Bun: 8.86
Cheese: 6.29
Condiments: 7.43
Overall Taste: 8.00
French Fries: 7.29
Restaurant Experience: 8.43
Returnability: 7.14

Overall Score: 7.60

Overall, we all enjoyed our experience there. Most BOTM members would definitely return. So, I think I have to give Scaddy's the official BOTM stamp of approval (not that it is worth anything). But, if you go to Scaddy's, tell them that the BOTM sent you...just so you can see the confused looks on their faces.

P.S. Here is the BOTM leaderboard:

Scaddy's: 7.60
B&D Burgers: 5.59

Stay tuned for more exciting BOTM adventures.

Word of the Day: Perdiddle

I learned a new word the other night. I was driving down the street at night and noticed that it seemed to be a little darker than normal. My passenger said that we were a "perdiddle". I had no idea what she was talking about. Granted, she and I were raised in different countries (I was raised on the East side and she was raised on the South side).

She had to explain to me that a perdiddle is a car with only one headlight on. Who knew that there was a term for this. I came home and looked it up on Urban Dictionary and she was right. Who knew?

So, now I have learned a new word. Unfortunately, it means that I also have to go out and change my headlight.

Isn't it time yet?

A fellow BOTM member sent this to me to symbolize their desire for the next BOTM trip. It has seemed like a very long time since we have partaken in beef. I guess we'll just have to count down the days.

Thanks for the picture, Veggie Victoria. We'll get you to eat a bacon cheeseburger yet!

P.S. What is he cramming into his mouth? I can't tell.

I will glady pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today

Our BOTM club decided to venture out into the big, bad burger world. We knew that the first choice of a burger location would be critical to the success of the Burger of the Month. We couldn't take any chances with this first choice.

So, we let the one vegetarian in our group choose.

Now, I know what you are thinking. How can a vegetarian (at least a vegetarian when it comes to red meat) be a part of the exclusive Burger of the Month? I guess my screening process wasn't as strict as I thought.

Veggie Victoria (names have been changed to protect the innocent) picked a local favorite called B&D Burgers. She claims that the B&D stands for big and dirty. We piled into the car (NASCAR Ned actually had to ride in the back of the SUV in the cargo hold) and went to the B&D Burgers up by the University of Utah.

Unfortunately, B&D Burgers did not live up to the hype. Maybe we just caught them on a bad day. The hamburgers were average, the fries were better (other BOTM members said that the zucchini fries made the trip worthwhile), and the shakes weren't shaken.

Here is a look at the final results (all results are on a scale from 1 to 10, where 1 is "I think I just threw up a little in my mouth" and 10 is "I have died and gone to heaven!":

Meat: 5.33
Bun: 7.67
Cheese: 5.33
Condiments: 4.83
Overall Taste: 5.17
French Fries: 5.33
Restaurant Experience: 3.83
Returnability: 4.50

Best. YouTube. Video. Ever.

This has to be the best music video ever. I vaguely remember the Knight Rider TV show, but I think this has permanently changed my view of The Hoff.

The start of something wonderful

A few weeks ago, some coworkers and I read an article about a group of businessmen in New York who started an exclusive club called the Burger of the Month Club (BOTM for short). You can read all about it in this article from the NY Times.

We decided that we wanted to be as cool as a group of businessmen from New York (and our cholesterol levels have been dangerously low lately), so we decided to form our own BOTM club (pronounced Bottom Club...but don't assume that we have big ones). The original BOTM club offered the opportunity to form an officially licensed BOTM club. But, my application was never returned. I assume that we were rejected. Maybe they didn't think there were any good hamburger joints in Utah. Well, we decided to form our own non-licensed (or insured, for that matter) BOTM club. Throw caution to the wind!

Our goal is to find the best hamburger in the greater Salt Lake City area. And, also we just want to have an excuse to take long lunches.

Once a month, a BOTM Club member is responsible for choosing a hamburger restaurant that they think is the best. We figure that there is quite a bit of pressure with this decision because if they choose a lousy restaurant, they are going to be met with ridicule and derision for an entire month.

I created an evaluation form that our founding Bottom Feeders (my pet name for my coworkers) would fill out after each burger excursion. The evaluation form would cover such areas as meat, condiments, bun, and overall taste. I also included a category for french fries...because who eats a hamburger without french fries?

I'll document our various hamburger experiences. Feel free to suggest places you would recommend.